Thursday, April 06, 2006

Ruth 3&4; Psalms 64&65;2 Corinthians 6

Risk Everything BE a FREAK
I walked away from SGL Women this morning with the same old same old ....'you're such a FREAK' resonating in my head....but my heart....my heart was hearing.....'I made you that way' and so it didn't get hard, my heart that is. My thoughts were so scattered and could so quickly as per usual become about me and yet the knowing that YOU YOU the God of the universe love me anyway and perhaps even made me this way......the tears became about loving You...just love You and hopefuly becoming infectious in that love....maybe that still is making it about me but it doesn't seem that way, it seems to be pointing me back to YOU and ......'be still and know that YOU are God'.........

Talk about Risking Everything.....Ruth 3: 9 "Who are you?" he asked. "I am your servant Ruth," she said. "Spread the corner of your garment over me, since you are a kinsman-redeemer."
Pretty bold... he could have embarassed her in front of ....he could have kicked her to the curb......he didn't .....she asked and he didn't.......


Psalm 65: 8 Those living far away fear your wonders;
where morning dawns and evening fades
you call forth songs of joy.


In the trinity....in YOUR 'usness' (Experiencing the Trinity/DW Johnson) we are where morning dawns and evening fades...through nothing we have done or did or could do we are there.....in the trinity....Experiencing life with YOU ...it doesn't make sense and it makes perfect sense...YOU call forth songs of JOY.....I may be a FREAK but I accept 'this'....You offered it all along and I ACCEPT it...You always offer it.....You never withhold??? We have to see it and accept it and in the acceptance is our being accepted...I don't know but something definitely to ponder......to be AMAZED by and drawn deeper and deeper into the mystery of it......?

2Corinthians 6: Paul's Hardships 3We put no stumbling block in anyone's path, so that our ministry will not be discredited. 4 Rather, as servants of God we commend ourselves in every way: in great endurance; in troubles, hardships and distresses; 5 in beatings, imprisonments and riots; in hard work, sleepless nights and hunger; 6 in purity, understanding, patience and kindness; in the Holy Spirit and in sincere love; 7 in truthful speech and in the power of God; with weapons of righteousness in the right hand and in the left; 8 through glory and dishonor, bad report and good report; genuine, yet regarded as impostors; 9 known, yet regarded as unknown; dying, and yet we live on; beaten, and yet not killed; 10 sorrowful, yet always rejoicing; poor, yet making many rich; having nothing, and yet possessing everything.
The whole of _____ calling me 'inauthentic'......'genuine yet regarded as impostors'......that can, could, has stopped... combined with the FREAK label I usually get so caught up in 'not being understood'...making it about ME and here YOU very clearly lay out it's gonna happen......
Risk Everything...can I live never being understood?? I have to stop with the 'what ifs' and TRY....for me this is a turning point, it may sound feeble but while God is working or calling me to love the other is always out to sidetrack me...?...how sad this is all it takes for me.. but yet Praise You that I haven't had to be beaten or abused or to lose a spouse or child all the things that I THOUGHT would take me away from You and here it is as simple as .....as selfish AS needing to be 'understood'????
I am a freak you know....and yet I am loved by the God of the universe.........WOW You are amazing God!!

4 comments:

lexi said...

the greatest leaders aren't understood as much as they are followable...Christ's love in you makes you followable beck! freak or not you carry the essence of your Creator wherever you go. He was misunderstood too....not trying to save you...just trying to encourage you to keep on being a freak...a Jesus freak.

dwg said...

It’s like looking in a mirror.

Mrs Zeke said...

You know what, a freak is only a freak in a specific moment in time. The one who calls another a freak is one that will become a freak to another in another time and place. I used to be very worried cause I did not fit well with the other mom's in PTA and lately approaching 40 I found myself being worried about my personal sense of style and if I was not grown up enough for age. But I realized I like what I like I am the way I am and as long as I fit within God's scope of things I'm ok. In fact I am writing a post about that. I never did nor do I know care so why worry. However when in Rome I do adapt to be respectful but I adapt in my way that works for me. So be a freak if that is what you are cause I think God really loves freaks, of course He loves all.

You will never be a freak to the ones that connect to you because of who you are and they need you..so keep being you :)

Your loved

Danielle said...

Hey Becky...from one Jesus Freak to another...GO GIRL! God is good!

Thank you for your hunger!

In Christ,
Danielle