Tuesday, October 02, 2007

Zechariah 12-14; Psalm 147; Luke 15

Met with gals this morning, our intent is to read and journal together. I came away annoyed, this one gal is not happy, seemingly has no joy. So what makes us happy/ joy filled and is happy a light in and around a Christ Follower, does it need to be? Am I simply happy because I have a relatively easy life? When you are Real you don’t mind being hurt…..that I am annoyed shows how far from real I am.
How do I think I will love women far from God and hurting IF I get annoyed by fellow Followers of Christ? This whole following Christ, journeying into this relationship is fraught with annoyances and what does that say about me? That I am and forever will be the Elder Brother? God I hope not. I in experiencing the GRACE that the prodigal experienced, his Father running to him want desperately to extend grace and love and instead I get annoyed……
The Parable of the Lost Son
11Jesus continued: "There was a man who had two sons. 12The younger one said to his father, 'Father, give me my share of the estate.' So he divided his property between them.
13"Not long after that, the younger son got together all he had, set off for a distant country and there squandered his wealth in wild living. 14After he had spent everything, there was a severe famine in that whole country, and he began to be in need. 15So he went and hired himself out to a citizen of that country, who sent him to his fields to feed pigs. 16He longed to fill his stomach with the pods that the pigs were eating, but no one gave him anything.
17"When he came to his senses, he said, 'How many of my father's hired men have food to spare, and here I am starving to death! 18I will set out and go back to my father and say to him: Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. 19I am no longer worthy to be called your son; make me like one of your hired men.' 20So he got up and went to his father. "But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him.
21"The son said to him, 'Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son.’
22"But the father said to his servants, 'Quick! Bring the best robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. 23Bring the fattened calf and kill it. Let's have a feast and celebrate. 24For this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.' So they began to celebrate.
25"Meanwhile, the older son was in the field. When he came near the house, he heard music and dancing. 26So he called one of the servants and asked him what was going on. 27'Your brother has come,' he replied, 'and your father has killed the fattened calf because he has him back safe and sound.'
28"The older brother became angry and refused to go in. So his father went out and pleaded with him. 29But he answered his father, 'Look! All these years I've been slaving for you and never disobeyed your orders. Yet you never gave me even a young goat so I could celebrate with my friends. 30But when this son of yours who has squandered your property with prostitutes comes home, you kill the fattened calf for him!'
31" 'My son,' the father said, 'you are always with me, and everything I have is yours. 32But we had to celebrate and be glad, because this brother of yours was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.' "
So how to repent of being annoyed.....that's a judgement, see myself yet again as a Pharisiacal Judge and be really sad that THAT is who I am?? Eugene Peterson A Long Obedience the Same Direction says : Repentance is a realization that what God wants from you and what you want from God are not going to be achieved by doing the same old things, thinking the same old thoughts. Repentance is a decision to follow Jesus Christ and become his pilgrim in the path of peace.


jennypo said...


Yes, isn't this what it means to be REAL, to love? To struggle, to choose the thing I don't feel like choosing so that I may choose Him who is Love? Our sin is not in being annoyed, but in letting ourselves stay there. The annoyance and our struggle over it is simply the price of love. Let us pay it, then, and gladly!

Oh, how lovely our Jesus! How merciful he is to us in our weak, weak willingness to walk as he walked and love as he loved!

holy chaos said...

i think seeing yourself and praying and asking God to change us is the only way we can change the things in ourselves that we do not like. I have alot of those...

becky said...

I think it is great that you want to help others. One thing I have learned in my walk with others is in order to be real I learn to be real with what I feel...

own your annoyance and understand why you are annoyed.

When you desire to help others understand the desire as well as understanding yourself first.

Robert said...

new understanding seems to occur almost everyday doesnt it becky??? the openness with which you nakedly reveal your heart and soul to Him and to us leads you onward as it does all of us realizing the *annoyance* can only help to guide you deeper and to repent daily as you spoke on thanks for always proving spiritual *meat* becky trudge trudge trudge

Barbara (aka Layla) said...

I like what Jenny said. I would like to add that I don't see the older bro in you at all, with me you have been one of the most gracious and accepting people I know. I know I can be a whiner and a cry-baby and self-centered friend, but you always love me even when I am acting like that.

We are so hard on ourselves. I would like to learn to to receive love from others and from myself - and you are helping me to learn that. You also help me to see that Knowing Him is worth all the struggles on the journey.