Job 17; Acts 24-26

Overload....Overload and not ALL in a bad way....just Los Angelos and Christianity Explored and Hospitality and the Birthday Celebration and the holidays and and ......just alot and not sure where to step up and where to just wait and see and JUMP into serve.......so I feel an anticipation, and excited but a fear of overload??
I am nothing but a coward?? Or .....???? I don't know and while I don't want to run I am not especially sure where to turn or what to do???
Acts 26: 24 At this point Festus interrupted Paul's defense. "You are out of your mind, Paul!" he shouted. "Your great learning is driving you insane." 25"I am not insane, most excellent Festus," Paul replied. "What I am saying is true and reasonable. 26 The king is familiar with these things, and I can speak freely to him. I am convinced that none of this has escaped his notice, because it was not done in a corner. 27 King Agrippa, do you believe the prophets? I know you do." 28Then Agrippa said to Paul, "Do you think that in such a short time you can persuade me to be a Christian?" 29 Paul replied, "Short time or long—I pray God that not only you but all who are listening to me today may become what I am, except for these chains."

I like better the Message translation: 24 That was too much for Festus. He interrupted with a shout: "Paul, you're crazy! You've read too many books, spent too much time staring off into space! Get a grip on yourself, get back in the real world!" 25 But Paul stood his ground. "With all respect, Festus, Your Honor, I'm not crazy. I'm both accurate and sane in what I'm saying. 26 The King knows what I'm talking about. I'm sure that nothing of what I've said sounds crazy to him. He's known all about it for a long time. You must realize that this wasn't done behind the scenes. 27 You believe the prophets, don't you, King Agrippa? Don't answer that--I know you believe." 28 But Agrippa did answer: "Keep this up much longer and you'll make a Christian out of me!" 29 Paul, still in chains, said, "That's what I'm praying for, whether now or later, and not only you but everyone listening today, to become like me--except, of course, for this prison jewelry!"

Just this week feeling perfectly crazy, having people look at me (my perception of course) like I am crazy....what I hear is FREAK ....my own Father several years ago pointblank looking at me and asking me if I wasn't sure that I might be insane...he used the word insane and at that time it hurt and the hurt is probably still there ....and then having people tell me I am hard to understand...hard to listen to....what is about me and what is about THEM???....

But Dan says 'keep my passion for Christ'...trust that God will work it out for His good.... he implores me to keep my passion and thus encourage him.......and to be honest IT is what I am praying for....for others to know Christ so deeply and be moved so passionately in whatever way HE gifted them to move and serve.
So if I am crazy....then let me be crazy for Christ......I do hate it though because one of my deepest felt needs is or was......nah....gotta stay focused on Christ......So I think this prayer is just for me today and maybe for you....Give me wisdom, O LORD, to discern the best way to use my time and my influence. Open my eyes to see the temptation the evil one puts in my path. Give me courage to boldly stand for you and sensitivity to know the best way to bless others according to their needs. In Jesus' name I pray. Amen.
And then this bit of hope from my Oswald Devotion this morning as well...I may be CRAZY but I think I will take CRAZY for CHRIST anyday...Thank you Father for my husband who always encouraging me....
When looking back on the lives of men and women of God the tendency is to say - What wonderfully astute wisdom they had! How perfectly they understood all God wanted! The astute mind behind is the Mind of God, not human wisdom at all. We give credit to human wisdom when we should give credit to the Divine guidance of God through childlike people who were foolish enough to trust God's wisdom and the supernatural equipment of God.