Friday, April 20, 2007

So many blessings
Too many to count
But oh well I can try:
  • My saviour
    His word and Spirit within me guiding me as I learn more and more the value of LISTENING.
    The GRACE I experience as I learn the depth of my self centeredness
    The HOPE that follows that humbling
    That this life is a journey discovering You and Your plan for us
    My husband
    My children including the marrying in ones!
    My Grandchildren
    My job and the people I work with all of them
    My church and the family there
    Going to Hawaii
    The joy I experience on the back of the bike with my amazing husband
    That my family is healthy
    That I enjoy good health
    It’s SPRING

I could go on and on and on I am blessed and I am grateful for each and every blessing and pray to be focused on You and remember all that You are and provide.... Thank You Father for YOUR LOVE.
1 Samuel 23 David on the run from Saul, collecting his followers as he went, Saul with unlimited resources in pursuit... but IF GOD is for you who can be against you…… 14 David stayed in the desert strongholds and in the hills of the Desert of Ziph. Day after day Saul searched for him, but God did not give David into his hands.

I would like to forget Saturday seeing the ‘pile of stink’ and that’s what it is, what I saw it as…the pile of stink that is my thinking I am better than anyone else. I saw it and wanted to run away, to ignore but in the seeing I actually ‘felt’ this sense of needing to look at it, really look at it.

I do....I always have thought of myself as better than others. There was and is no denying it with Him and yet in that looking, that lack of denial…in the midst of heartbreaking heaviness and sadness there was so much GRACE. I don’t know if I can explain it and to try is kind of scary but it was there…it’s still there, the grace…. because that pile of stink is still there….I think it.....I can’t justify it or excuse it... to confess it even here is embarrassingly shameful and yet maybe it’s part of the journey…..that I thought it without thinking about it for so long, now in the thinking about it, in the looking and seeing and smelling it for what it is….can I stop…?

I hope so and more importantly am praying it to be so…..Matthew 7 : 1"Do not judge, or you too will be judged. 2 For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.


Lyndsey said...

i'm going to rat you out here to all your blog friends, mom! it's Becky's birthday today everyone! Happy Birthday, Mom - love you!

Michelle said...

Happy Birthday Becky!!

Robert said...

happy Birthday becky!!! enjoy enjoy and relish the GRACE which He supplies even when we feel/think we are at our lowest

Rick said...

I hate piles of stink. But birthdays are cool.