I had breakfast with a gal this morning who comes from a pretty I am thinking charismatic church experience. She has amazing insight and wisdom and a soft seeking heart or so it seems to me.( I gauge this as we are able to talk about anything and often do so with tears in our eyes. I'm not saying that is a correct guage to use, what is a soft heart to you?)
We talked about a lot of stuff and came back always to a sense of not knowing anything for sure anymore save for Jesus died for us.
She referenced at the height of her devotion how she downsized her job, was driving a hundred miles to do prison ministry and did a lot of other stuff that sounded pretty remarkable.
But when her church split she stopped..... and her daughter remembered this period of time as ‘not fun’.
She referred to that period of time as living and breathing for Jesus. ....
It seemed to me and I mentioned to her that IF she stopped at the time of the church split, it wasn’t about Jesus....?....
Making me ask this morning what does living and breathing for Jesus look like?
Are we, as fallen and self protective people even able to? consistently?
And IF we could what would it look like?
I wonder if we in our self protective methods of operations still just have hard hearts??
I wonder how long it takes to completely soften / transform and I guess maybe not this side of heaven????....
But we recognize the hardening quicker and turn back sooner……???
image from www.harbenpictures
Jesus Walks on the Water
45 Immediately Jesus made his disciples get into the boat and go on ahead of him to Bethsaida, while he dismissed the crowd. 46 After leaving them, he went up on a mountainside to pray.
47When evening came, the boat was in the middle of the lake, and he was alone on land. 48 He saw the disciples straining at the oars, because the wind was against them. About the fourth watch of the night he went out to them, walking on the lake. He was about to pass by them, 49 but when they saw him walking on the lake, they thought he was a ghost. They cried out, 50 because they all saw him and were terrified.
Immediately he spoke to them and said, "Take courage! It is I. Don't be afraid." 51 Then he climbed into the boat with them, and the wind died down. They were completely amazed, 52 for they had not understood about the loaves; their hearts were hardened.